Here’s a couple of Joanne’s questions:
How long did it take you to feel as though you’ve fully recovered?
I guess 2 years from the point when I decided I wanted to get better.
That being said I don’t know if you ever fully recover. It is something that stays with you and hovers in the back of your mind. Especially during times of high stress.
If you have had an eating disorder, is that how you feel too? I’d like to hear from you.
The other point I’d like to mention: What is “ordered” eating if that is the contrast to “disordered”? Is anyone here really eating in a mainstream way? I don’t think so! We are a minority among the millions of people brainwashed by the media about health and nutrition. Is there a “normal” diet? Look at the contrast between different cultures and nationalities!
At the end of the day, my eating to some would still be considered “disordered”. Some would now label me othorexic, because I choose to eat only healthful nourishing foods. At times I practice fasting for mental clarity and to cleanse myself of toxins. Is fasting healthy? To many of the uninitiated, the answer is no. (More on fasting in a later post.)
You just can’t win! : )
Would you say that vegetarianism lead to to become psychologically damaged, causing your eating disorder or was vegetarianism a symptom of your eating disorder?
Yes it was definitely a factor.
When I was following a vegetarian diet, I found myself constantly reaching for high carbohydrate foods. I have no doubt that this is what led to my worsened state of depression. I had headaches, an overgrowth of candida, constant hunger and terrible mood swings.
My typical diet (initially) was like this:
Low fat wheat cereal with 99% fat free skim milk with a coffee for breakfast
A couple of pieces of fruit for a snack
Salad with no dressing or salad sandwich with no butter for lunch
More fruit
Vegetable curry with white rice or vegetable pasta dish for dinner
MORE fruit or chocolate for dessert
Maybe a piece of bread or a biscuit with coffee for supper
WHERE WAS MY PROTEIN AND FAT!?
I made sure to eat “healthy” and always chose low or no fat options. I never used fat in cooking and also believed protein was “fattening”. I would use fat free dressings, no spreads on my bread, often just dry toast and jam (winces). I didn’t even eat much soy because I didn’t like it. Instead of sugar, I used artificial sweeteners in everything.
As a result of eating this way I was constantly tired and hungry. It also made it much easier to start eating sparsely, I had already cut out most foods, I just started to cut out even more.
The worst thing about it was, I thought I was very healthy! Contrasting with my health now, how wrong I was!
About the Author...
I've finally overcome my destructive eating habits by learning to accept myself, applying the WAPF nutritional principles daily. I'm now at a stable, healthy, slim weight, have lots of energy and no more guilt. I've been happily married for 7 years and am a graphic designer. In the near future I'm hoping to start a nutritional course and start practicing as a qualified nutritionist. At the moment it's all self education.
May 12th, 2008 at 7:54 pm
Well done Louise for having the courage and perserverance to take the time to research and change your diet. Embracing fats, especially saturated fats as healthy is really difficult for anyone to start with. Overcoming our conditioning from childhood is a lot of hard work, I can’t imagine how difficult it must have been for you to overcome a fear of fats and to a lesser degree protein. What resources did you find the most helpful in your journey (besides WAPF website)? And what or who was responsible for planting that first seed of change that led you on the path to where you are now?
Your old diet is a good example of what I see every day in my practice. What’s even scarier is that minus the coffee it’s an exact replica of what I see so many people feeding their children.
Lots of nourishing food, thoughts and actions
Sarah
May 12th, 2008 at 8:22 pm
Thank you for your comment Sarah. It had been a LOOOOONG journey to get to where I am now. You are right about fat. Eating more protein gradually became easier, but fat was a mountainous obstacle.
I systematically read every single book on diet in the library and stumbled on “The Schwarzbein Principle”. At the time I dismissed it as rubbish but in the back of my mind I was impressed by the science. I’ve always been a thinker and the more books I read the more I disagreed with popular nutrition. After all, our body instinctively knows what is good for it and craves those foods. I was feeling so sick and tired on my diet, getting very thin and depressed. I was also scared of the enormous harm I was doing to my body, and was particularly worried about my bone density - my grandmother suffers from severe osteoporosis.
I also stumbled upon a very strange website http://www.karenkellock.org/ (she’s changed it a lot since I first found her). She advocated a diet of fruit, fauna and fat. Her theory was one meal a day of fruit (any type including non-sweet fruits), fauna (animal products and meat) and fat (animal fats like butter, nuts, coconut oil and olive oils) then fast the rest. This appealed to me immensely, wrapped up as I was in the throes of an eating disorder.
I started researching with a view to eating more animal fats than advocated by most modern diets. This in turn led me to the WAPF website. I had been eating ‘FFF’ for a while, my hormones had leveled out and I wasn’t feeling irrational anymore. In fact I WANTED to eat and be healthy. I started seeing a counsellor and she set me on the path to recovery.